Editors Note: Really.. this will be the end of the silliness... tomorrow we'll return to your regularly scheduled programing. But for now, Part 2 of The Real Story about Nibbles.
Don't ask me how, but I have it on good authority that after her mysterious disappearance, Nibbles was found under dubious circumstances. The apparent target of murderous rage by a highly irritated goatherd, an unnamed employee verily threw himself over Nibbles, pleaded for her life, and saved her from The Grill. She disappeared shortly thereafter. The “Company” was said to have sent in a henchmen to interrogate barnyard employees as to her whereabouts.
It was heavily rumored that while questioning was conducted " in full accord of the Geneva Convention" we doubt that the information was provided willingly. Reports confirmed that the agents in charge, the guineas (agents known as Bob and Roy) said that the the turkey hen, designation Chirper., "sung like a canary." Regardless of how it was provided we found out that Nibbles was placed in the witness protection program.
However, with budget cuts as they are, apparently Witness Protection just isn't what it used to be.
After 36 hours in a seclusion with only a roll of scotch tape and a bag of shredded paper the mystery has been solved... the following was just posted on wikileaks. But we don't know who posted it, right?
Nibbles Retrieval Mission Notes
Acting on intel provided by The Snitch.. aka, Chirper the turkey hen, the dogs and I donned our Barnyard SWAT gear and prepared to storm the target. We were "coms live and five by five" as we repelled down the side of the house and into the turkey yard.
We neutralized the guards and executed a grid search for our target. Crouched low and hidden in the poison ivy, we belly-crawled to a secure position. We then observed the turkey herd to see if we could confirm ID of the target.
Initially we thought our target had been tipped off – there was talk of a mole in the organization. But then the news came over the com that Shine, the barncat, had "taken out" the mole and was eating it in the barn.
We switched to infrared to get a visual... and there she was! Nibbles was casually trying to blend in with the turkey hens and was making some kind of "gob-baaa-boogle gob-baaa-boogle gob-baaa-boogle gob-baaa-boogle noises. Her bad gobbling technique and accent was the give away.
Otherwise we wouldn't have seen her. The disguise was good. Someone had stuck a red glove on her head and duct taped some turkey feathers on her back.
We shot our way in, secured the target, and it was a running battle to our rendezvous point where we were helo'd out.
After the debriefing and subsequent psych evals we determined that she could return to her position. But just in case we have the goat shed bugged and placed a GPS tracker in her phone.
There was no additional information provided on whoever was assisting her. She would not give up her accomplices.We continue to monitor the situation and we are surveilling an area known as the "man cave."
Barnyard status: as normal as it ever is.