The Summer of My Dryer Discontent

You have no idea how happy I am that the summer of my dryer discontent is now OVER. Sheesh!

A few days ago we took a drive into the hinterlands and picked up a new-to-us dryer. For $30. Around here $30 buys you a lot of love.

We've been dryer-less since the end of May and I tell you the truth - I've hated every single second. My friend, Eliza, asked me why she didn't know about my angst... but really, I've tried very hard not to complain. But now that we have an old workhorse of a dryer downstairs happily fluffing my underpants... I'll tell you all about it.

I hate when appliances don't work so when our good old dryer finally went belly up it was a total shock.  I assume some kind of appliance fairy is gonna show up and fix it. But that never happens so I usually take matters into my own hands - generally by throwing the old appliance out in the yard. I'm not even kidding. One time my husband drove in to see an ill-behaved dishwasher in the front yard - on its side with all its guts hanging out. He took one look at the murderous glare in my eye and two days later victoriously drove home with a new dishwasher strapped to the back of the truck. Happy wife, happy life - ain't that right.

Unfortunately the dryer situation didn't work out so smoothly. We really weren't in the right place to run right out and buy a new one, and we didn't have any luck with craigslist....apparently folks won't split up a washer/dryer set. And I was momentarily brainwashed by the soft cooings of dryer-less fanatics who swore I'd "never go back" once I starting hanging my unmentionables out in the yard for all the world to see.

There's about a million reasons why I don't like to line dry laundry - most of them are logistical. First, I'm short - so the line has to be pretty darn low. But then the sheets hang pretty close to the ground...and when you have all these large male dogs who pee on anything new. Well, you can do the math on that one.

Next, I'm allergic to everything so having all my clothes out there doing nothing but flappin' in the breeze and catching all the pollen... well.. doesn't really help anyone but the folks who make Claritin.

Then, no matter what I had to walk up a set of stairs to get outside to that stupid clothesline. Carrying an unwieldy laundry basket was just awkward. And then there's all the tripping over cats inside...and chickens outside. By the time I got to the stupid clothesline I was battered and bruised and half the clothes needed to be washed again.

Not to mention that I could really one do about one load of clothes a day - this summer was so wet that everything took forever to dry. So unless I started really early a weeks worth of laundry took a week to do, instead of a day.

But now... now the sweet sound of the dryer going round is taking the edge off my appliance rage. And I don't even care that I'm wasting all that electricity. My goal is to use up all the electric in the county today - in fact, I'm pretty sure the president of our co-op is gonna roll up in his limo and shake my hand for increasing demand and sending prices sky high.

That's right fellow Farm Pirates, I'm perfectly happy to raise our own food and live by the "use it up, make do or do without" motto.... but dontcha try and get me to give my up dryer. Ain't no way, no how I'm doing this again. Now if you excuse me I'm gonna get my third load of laundry going today. I should be caught up on a summer's worth of wash by this afternoon.

Happy Monday everyone! Anybody else got clothesline rage?