Me and the mower.......

This happened..... apparently the mower and I have a failure to communicate.  Don't worry, I got the big hammer and fixed it. Again.

So, you wanna, dance, mower? Fine. Let's do this thing...

Yesterday hubs and I spent two straight hours mowing. Both of us, at the same time, with dueling push mowers. While the yard looks better....and the big hill down to the pond low looks like a charming, park-like setting... I hate the mower. I hate mowing. Having grass is stupid.

One of my goals in life is to never spend another valuable moment of my life mowing again... or maybe have only enough grass that it only takes about 15 minutes with a push mower to mow.

I went on a significant rant about the folks around here and their unnatural devotion to mowing here.

It's just stunning to me. There are hungry people in our community but the nearest biggish town doesn't even have a community pea patch or garden. On the way into town you can see yards that are several acres.... all in perfectly mowed grass. I would think that people would have something more important do do with their time.

Are there fruit trees? Regular trees? Interesting shrubbery? Nope. Can't mow under a tree so all the houses around here look like they were randomly dropped on a putting green. I just think it's weird. With every single step all I can think about is how I'll never get that time back..... so me and the mower continue our fight.

And before anyone says it, I will save you the trouble. NO! The goats do not get out there and evenly trim the grass down to an acceptable level. At this point Debbie and Nibs are on a Performance Improvement Plan as neither of them are even grazing the bramble. So everyone who is a ruminant is in trouble.

Me on the other hand..... me and the mower will continue to fight about it.

Happy Sunday, everyone! Are you wasting your time and money mowing? Do you hate it also?

I revenge-bought a lot of zucchini in response to being hornswoggled by an unscrupulous produce purveyor

You know, I get that locally produced produce is better quality than store food and I'm OK with paying a bit more - especially given the recent food safety recalls...  but think it is also true that there is such a thing as taking it too far. I found out the hard way about artisanal pricing recently.

I was at a local farmer's market recently I figured I'd get me one of those beautiful looking early season zucchinis a vendor had on their table. I marched over with a dollar in my hands thinking that maybe the price for the smallish zucch would be maybe $0.75.... or maybe even $1... but that would be pushing it. I can get zucchinis from my Amish neighbor for $0.25 during the season. Heaven knows I am the only person in the mid-west who can't grow their own damn zucchinis.


"How much on the zucchini"" I asked already holding out my dollar.

"$1.50" She replied.

I stood there stupefied. One DOLLAR and fifty cents? For one small zucchini? I was so stunned I actually paid it and then skulked away.... ashamed at being hornswoggled. Usually I'm a pretty good negotiator but this caught me so off guard I couldn't even defend myself from such piracy.

I took it home and cooked it up for dinner. I have to admit that having the first real, fresh veg of the season was pretty good. But I was still mad. So I took action.

Later that week I went on down to local produce auction. I shoved other people out of the way so I could be in the front row. I stood defiantly near a peck box of zucchs. When the bidding started no one would match my aggressive buying.

"Sold!" Called the auctioneer. "What's your number honey?"

"298!" I said, "I'll take two boxes!"  And then I marched off, victoriously, to the office to pay for my purchases.

This is what I got for $6. Six whole dollars - why it's more zucchini than any one person could eat...

Two glorious peck baskets of farm fresh zucchini. $6 total. Not each, total.

Based on the artisanal pricing at the market my $6 would have only gotten me four of these little beauties. Four.

Four. Ha!

Who is laughing now, Zucchini Pirate Lady? Who? ME! That's who.

So now we've been having zucchini, in many different iterations, every night for dinner. And lunch. And even breakfast also. All my friends are getting zucchinis just because... it's a thoughtful gift. Pretty sure we are set on zucchinis now for a while.

From now on I'm going to stick with farmstands and the produce auction. 

Happy Tuesday, everyone! Did you ever revenge buy a bunch of zucchinis to get back at an unscrupulous produce purveyor?

Minor annoyances

Today has been filled with minor annoyances. I woke up grumpy and it's only getting worse. At this point everyone with a tail is avoiding eye contact and they are giving me at 10 foot radius.... except for Nicholas who is in time out for trying to pull my sandwich off the counter.

Tensions are high. This situation ended badly. Cats don't like to share.

By 9am it had only gotten worse because I realized that I didn't have any hay for the goats who refuse to walk outside because the grass is wet. I know this because my shoes and socks were already wet from walking in the wet grass so I kinda understood how they felt.

It got worse because I messed up The Paperwork, The People Who Annoy Me were annoying me, I couldn't find what I needed in town yesterday,  I tweaked my back, and it feels like someone is sticking a red hot poker in my eye. And worse... there is a banana in the kitchen stinking to high heaven. I can feel it in there rotting with its.... putrescence...and rotting.

Just when it couldn't get any worse I remembered that it could, in fact, get worse.

The weather lady reminded us that about a year ago it was a record breaking hot day.....and I remembered that all of this happened...it was a day of days.  It was pretty bad when it all went down. 

Looking back that day was way worse than this day.

In the end that slew of problems was fixed.... my husband figured out how to fix the air conditioning without an expensive repair bill, I was able to fix the floor, we got rid of the most annoying of the goats, that duck is still around, and Nicholas... well he is still in the way of everything but I love him so it's OK.

One of the things that I like best about my marriage is that my husband and I don't turn on each other in the face of adversity - we turned toward each other. We make a plan and get it done. So we were able to solve all those problems without blaming each other - instead we cheered each other on.  So we can get thru this bad day also.

I'm determined to have a turn around today. I changed my shoes, changed directions, changed my mind, and am working on a better attitude. While I can't get any gardening done today I can work on some other things and be glad that what is planted is really growing well.
 

This was waiting for my husband the other day - a well known banana lover- because he had a bad day. 

It's part of how we cheer each other on.

In a little while I'm going to go and get hay, mail The Paperwork, and get some ice cream. One way or another that banana will be gone by the end of the day.

When life gives you bananas - make a split!

Happy Tuesday, everyone - how are you doing? Hanging in there or do you have soggy shoes? Do you want a banana split?

Your food is trying to kill you, people are insane, and I-told-you-so about pigz.

It has been an incredible news cycle this morning... where do I even begin?

First up, we see how commercially produced food is doing a terrific job of keeping us all safe. Did everyone see this big recall? Here is the list from the CDC. It was weird to me that some of this is organic food and you'd think it would be better. But, as I understand it, once you get listeria in your production facility it is extremely difficult to get out.

After I saw the news I was out there willing my lettuce to grow - with my mind power.

If you are a small farmer and you want to sell your products to friends and neighbors or maybe at the local farm market you will soon be subject to hellacious food safety regulation. To be fair they do have some exceptions for smaller businesses -  but some of the farmers I know are shaking their heads. This may put a lot of farms out of business or at least dissuade them from even starting. This seems ridiculous when they hold up commercial production as the shining beacon of safety. I have to admit that I'm surprised that frozen foods are now kinda of hinky.
*scratches "buy frozen food" off my list...*

Hurry up, celery!!!

Personally, I can't wait for my garden to hurry up and start producing. I had to buy some celery the other day and I looked at it very suspiciously. At this point I'd rather take my chances from food grown in my dirt and that has very possibly been peed on by dogs than some of the big processors.

Mouse-poison-free onions.

Next, if the listeria from your frozen peas isn't gonna try and kill you.... there is this guy. Honestly what kind of world are we living in that produces this kind of behavior. One of the few 'salad bar' types of set ups that I like to go to is the one at Whole Foods. Now I'm going to be looking at it - and the other customers - kinda funny. It really makes me mad because the near-ish Whole Foods has a really nice Indian food buffet.
*scratches "go to Whole Foods" off my list...*

Potatoes are actually coming along pretty well. Hurry up.

So what are you going to do? Grow your own? Sure! But first a note of caution... your food on the hoof might be trying to kill you also. Violently. A couple of points about this story ...but first I feel like I can give the naysayers a told-you-so... I frequently get angry folks telling me that pigs are gentle loving creatures that just need snuggles.

Yeah.

Here is the hard truth: Pigs can be big, mean, and dangerous and all the snuggling is the world is not going to change the fact that any animal can have a bad day. When you couple that with a powerful animal... well.. things can go badly.

So before you run right out to get your pigz this summer carefully evaluate your facilities and your abilities to handle a large and possibly mean creature. 

Back to my points.....aside from the obvious that I hope these folks recover quickly and I'm very sorry to hear this happened.

1. I take great comfort in the fact that if I was attacked by a mean pig the very first thing my husband would do when we got home would be to walk directly out there and shoot that pig until it was completely dead. Be assured that pig would die a hard death.

2. These folks need better dogs. I'm always glad that I have my Brute Squad with me - even if we don't actually get into the pen with the pigz.  My crew have saved me from being buffaloed by big pigz many times.

3. The funny thing about this report is that they wonder why a pig would do that? Oh honey, pigz don't need a reason. Maybe it was sick or hurt but don't make the mistake of thinking that big, mean, and dangerous animals are reasonable or need a reason to do anything. 

As I said, whenever I talk about this I generally get berated by well meaning people with a "nah-UH!" and then am told I'm just ridiculous or that I'm "afraid of pig." Friends, I assure you that I have zero fear of pigz. I do, however, know what they are capable of so I never put my self in a position where I can be cornered and I always have the dogs with me.

I don't know about you but all of the food news today is crazy. Sometimes I think we should just forget all this work, move to the city, get a condo, and be regular people. But then I see stuff like this and I resolve that we are just going to keep producing our own food.

Good luck, everyone, it's crazy out there!

Stories like this....

Stories like this make me really glad we have a gate...  Did everyone see this hubbub about the guy who lets folks come to his farm for tours and birthday parties? Turns out some gal showed up and very nearly had kittens over the farmer's plan to make meat from a cow.

Quick! Someone please save Nibbles! Can't you see how abused she is!?!

So she got a bunch of folks together to protest it. The protesters want the cow to be moved to a sanctuary instead of going to butcher.  I can't find the link now of her phone interview where she was telling the reporter that the farmer should just go to Whole Foods like everyone else and buy his antibiotic free beef there. I'd laugh if this wasn't as serious as a heart attack. Can you believe it?

So the farmer, Mr. Benner, moved the cow off this property. Yep. Minnie the Cow is on the lam.

Mr. Benner was also being harassed... but he was also getting a lot of support as shown on the farm's facebook page.

The lesson here is if your big plan is to move out to the peaceful countryside, start a farm, and let everyone come on over to see your cows, pick berries or beans in your U-pick fields, or have their wedding at your place.... you might want to add a line item in your budget for "legal defense." Justice is expensive, folks, and defending yourself might be something you haven't thought about. But you should.

We never let anyone on the property and spend more time than we thought trying to keep people - and such - out of here.We are constantly annoyed...and surprised.... at the sheer numbers of fools who want to just show up here and look around. No. The answer is NO. You may not come over. Do not come thru the gate. Stay off our front field.

One of my friends deals with this also. She said the worst case of people coming on her property was when someone intentionally showed up and put her buck rabbit in with her does. She never found out who it was but there was a lot of babies bunnies after that. And no it was not funny at all. Maybe it was a little funny....but not to her.

Moving the cow off his property was a great idea.... You never know if someone would have tried to take the cow. Undoubtedly someone would have ended up getting hurt. Sure that cutesy-putesy cow is adorable until she gets startled and starts swinging her head around. Or if someone tried to get her in a trailer and got kicked. What farm people know that other people don't is that the barnyard is not one big petting zoo.

Livestock can be big, mean and dangerous....even if they aren't trying to be. Any animal can have a bad day. Well intended, but stupid people, can find out the hard way that rustling someone's cow may not only be a hanging offense, but a really really bad idea. It's pretty bad when you have to make considerations for this kind of thing.

Sure it sounds like a fun idea to have folks out to enjoy the country ... but you never know who is going to call animal control because your pigs are in the mud. Or your ducks are outside in the rain. You might think that all's you're doing is living your life but now anyone can plaster your name all over social media and create some kind of protest.

People are crazy, friends, so think hard before you open your property up to scrutiny. As for me, I think Mr. Benner was very wise to stand his ground. I hope that cow is delicious and it tastes like victory every time he has dinner. I'm very glad to see someone stand up against the crazy people in this country who are offended at everything.

Happy Sunday everyone! Were you fixin' to have folks come to your farm? Do you have the name of a good attorney?  Times are crazy, friends.

Six... no... Seven... Things I'm tired of explaining to (non-farm) people.

The other day I found one of those "What are you sick of explaining to people" posts over on "the reddit." Most of them are funny, some are snotty, but it's interesting so see other people's point of view. I also think it's a good reminder of how folks know about what they know about - and it's good to expand your knowledge and not limit yourself to your own world. People are very interesting.

 Sometimes this is what my day looks like.

Many people don't know about my world. I don't really "get sick" or "get tired" of explaining these things because I think it's important to share knowledge and educate folks. But these are the conversations I tend to have over and over.

1. This isn't the "simple" life. I do not know who got this falsehood started. There is nothing simple about it. Sure I tend to do the same thing over and over but it's all different all the time. There are always complicated problems and the stakes are high when the circle of life spins so close to where you are standing. I'll always tell you The Truth About Farming... and it is not simple.

2. Meat chickens and pigz are not my friends. They are dinner and I don't feel bad about it. Farm raised meat tastes like victory.... or as someone said, "Revenge Bacon."

3.  I used to be someone. With a job. And a nice house. Now I'm someone with a farm, and dogs, and a full time occupation.  It's a long way from there to here. But I remember what regular life is like.

I think it's kind of hard for folks to look at me now and even guess that I was a normal person once. I used to shop at Nordstroms, pay over $100 for a hair cut, and think my biggest problem was that stupid person at work who made my life hard. Ridiculous things happen to me now.

4. No. I don't have nice clothes. This is as good as it gets. Some of us say, we have farm clothes and church clothes and nothing in between. The last clean shirt I ever owned was before I learned to put little creatures in my bra. Nothing I own now has not been pooped on, peed on, or worse.

5. Just because I "don't work" doesn't mean that I have a lot of free time. No, I cannot drop everything. During the growing season I figure that I need at least two weeks notice before I can make any changes to my schedule. This is both frustrating and bewildering to people around me. It's even more confounding because I never actually know what day it is. My closest friends have learned to send me reminders before we are supposed to meet up. I am eternally grateful for that.

6. No, I'm not going back to the rat race. The only rat race I'm interested in is seeing if our barncat, Shine, can run down that huge rat that has been living in the turkey house. Other than that I think I'm stuck with this life - funny tho it is. People are really interested in the money thing tho. Maybe that is what they are really asking and maybe I'll talk about it. But to answer your question, yes I miss the money. But not enough to go back to it.

This next one is a freebie because it was actually my pal, D, was the one who said it....

7. No, I am not wasting my education.

I don't think education is ever wasted and I whole heartedly believe that you should get the best education that you can afford.... but I'll follow quickly with a reminder that unless you are in a specialty field then most likely your education is just a ticket to your first real job. My experience is that from that first job it's more about your work history and your ability to network with other people than your degree.

But am I wasting it? Nope - are you kidding? You always have to be learning, solving problems, managing, crafting, creating, scheduling, figuring, promoting, communicating, and crunching the numbers in this life. You must run your farm effectively - like a business - or it will fail. You have to investigate, research, strategize, and science the shit of of this life.

Regular people think that farm folks are not educated. That is not true. Friend, I have amassed a huge body of knowledge from this life. I couldn't get this education anywhere else. So nope, all those hours sitting in university courses were not wasted a bit. In fact, it helped.

Happy Wednesday everyone! Do you get asked the same questions over and over? What are you tired of explaining?

The curious case of K9 Ajax and why it matters.

If you are over on 'the facebok' then you know that yesterday I pretty much had a melt down over the cringe-inducing story of K9 Ajax over in the near-ish town of Marietta. I normally don't  talk about politics so what follows is as close a political commentary as you are going to get from me. But this made me mad.

Last week the story broke that the a long time officer in the small town City of Marietta was retiring and he thought he'd be able to keep his K9 partner. They didn't have any other K9 handlers. The officer brought in the money to buy the dog ($3,500 which was the value of the K9) but was told instead that K9 Ajax would have to be auctioned off.

My Most Excellent Good Dog. I call him "Sir." Not a shovel

In a now legendary comment the legal director for the town justified this by saying that K9 Ajax was personal property ..."just like a shovel."

To say there was an outcry on social media in an understatement.

There was an online petition and the gofundme donations are up to just about $70,000. What can I say? People love their dogs. Who doesn't know that?

The City of Marietta, that's who.

Their facebook page is a bloodbath. The handling of this situation should become a case study for first year Communications majors in What Not To Do. The press conference was live-streamed by the local TV station and was nothing short of a caricature of what is wrong with this country.

My Bubby is a BucketHead... but not a shovel.

To be sure, I doubt that K9 Ajax is the world's best police dog. I doubt if he could hold a candle to retired MWD Layka. He's probably never been in the Hard Dog Fast Dog competition. No one is saying he is on par with Mike Ritland's spectacular Trikos dogs. But all working police dogs are important.

It would take hours or days for people to find a missing kid when a well trained dog can do it in about 15 minutes. Police dogs are also good community outreach ambassadors, not to mention they usually get their man. So there is no doubt of their value.

People love their dogs. People love working police dogs. The folks in Canton know that their police dog K9 Jethro was not just a shovel. This is how you treat a working dog and his handler -with respect. Who didn't understand when Officer Popp collapsed to the ground in relief when he found his partner K9 Karson after being lost during our coldest weather last year? Heck, who hasn't thrown themselves down and hugged their dog like this gal?

No one doubts the bond between the handler and their dog. So to most folks it was completely understandable when former Officer Hickey was upset when he learned his partner would be sold at auction ..... like a shovel.

My beautiful Kai. We call her Digger but she is not a shovel.

It seemed to be a tough weekend for the City of Marietta. They tried to calm everyone down by putting useful posts on their fb page such as telling folks to send emails instead of crapping up their page. That didnt' work out very well for them.

So they announced there would be a press conference. We all tuned in. This is what I expected to see...

*Cut to scene - The former officer, the dog, the mayor, and the Chief of Police standing on the lawn somewhere... everyone smiling. The dog wags his tail. The Mayor speaks...... "Folks, thanks so much for your concern. We understand you are upset at what is a complicated situation and we want to assure everyone that we are doing everything we can to keep this crime fighting duo together in their golden years of retirement!"  The Mayor and the former officer shake hands, pictures are taken... everyone goes on about their business confident in their City's leadership.*

Nope. Look at them all sitting there. It went just about how you'd expect. Here - watch for yourself. See the spectacular display of finger pointing, name calling, who is a liar and who isn't, the ever popular quoting of regulations, the non-apology, the dismissiveness, the acknowledgement of the apparent "bad blood" between the parties ..and all of us just waiting for that law director guy to actually utter the words "What are you all so upset about it's JUST a dog?"

Thank heavens that last bit didn't actually happen. But you could tell it was on the tip of his tongue.

Somewhere in there, in between calling the former officer a liar and that "I'm a big fish in a small town"attitude that we all recognize...and the statement that the Chief had his own damn problems.... there seemed to be an offer to the former Officer that he could become an "auxiliary" member of the force and in this way the dog would still be in active duty and he could keep K9 Ajax. There seemed to be a lot of conditional statements attached to this. It wasn't a firm plan but it might be plausible. Maybe.

Lucky, actually is a Bucket Head.... Not my most able warrior but still not a shovel.

We also learned that last week, somewhere along the way that the Chief said he was sending another officer out to get the dog back from the former Officer Hickey.

Who was a jerk? Who is a victim? Who was right? Well, I think they all pretty much deserved each other and there is a lot of backstory that none us really need - or want - to know.  The hard truth is that the way the law is written, and in this circumstance, there has to be an auction.

But in this case there is a pretty big divide between being right and doing the right thing. There should have been a way to work this out. It should have been case closed. Everyone should have had confidence in the right thing. But it wasn't. Therein lies the rub and why folks are mad.

Not to mention, in a parting shot the Mayor told everyone who was commenting on the facebook to "get a life."

Oh no he didn't. Oh yes he did.

This is your elected official, folks, this is how he responds to the community's concerns.

Here's the thing. Sure, there are a lot more 'important' issues out there. This country is divided. None of us can solve the refugee crisis, racism, or put the broken economy back together. But regular, normal people can see that guy should get to keep his dog. Should be a done deal, right?

Instead what we all got to see is a microcosm of how far removed our leaders are from regular people. Folks are frustrated and no one is listening. How are you supposed to trust the leadership when they can't even use a little common sense in this situation? What if something really bad happens? Do you really want these jokers be in charge?

It's not just Marietta - it's everywhere. In a not-too-far-away community the County Clerk went to the hoosegow for skimming funds off the top, the wife of the mayor elect will probably be getting a lovely orange jumpsuit for "allegedly" feeding her gambling addiction to the tune of $80,000's worth of someone else's money, don't get me started about a 'keep your hands to yourself' situation in the Prosecutor's office... and no fewer than four somewhat-local teachers have been hauled off for having inappropriate sexual relations with their students.

Oh sure big cities have their problems too. A black kid will get shot 17 times because he looks dangerous... but this guy gets a get out of jail free card even though he killed four people on a drunk driving charge. And apparently it's kind of OK to poison an entire generation of kids because they are poor and no one cares.

This situation needed a hero and there wasn't one. We all need a hero right now. We all need to see something work out. We all need the right thing to be done and for regular folks to get a fair shake. If this guy, who has worked for the police department for what - 30 years? - if he can't get a fair deal then what chance do the rest of us have?

So go on now City of Marietta, keep up with your public relations disaster. Keep showing us you know best and we should all just get a life. Or I don't know, maybe actually lead the community out of this? Show some compassion. Come up with a winning solution. Just be that light. Prove to us regular people that it can all work out.

That's all we can ask for, right?

Anyway. That's all I've got to say about it for now.

My thanks to a good pal who saved my bad day yesterday by posting this adorable video. Yay!

Happy Tuesday, everyone, such as it is.

First snow

Today it snowed. Real flakes coming down out of the sky. Technically there were probably only about 12 flakes total... but they were there.

That is a snow flake. You might have to squint to see it...but it's there .... oh yes, it's there.

So starts the season of snow rage. I officially hate everything about this season. No, I don't think it's pretty. No, I don't like snuggling in. And while I do like sloth by the fire - but only in limited amounts -.....and I do love The Fire.... all I can think about is how I"ll be trapped inside until this inhuman season is over.

The dog remains unfazed. 

Carry on joyfully without me, winter lovers..... my big plan is to sit on the couch, eat carbs, and think about summertime.

Store chicken = F- .... Green Muscle Disease.

I couldn't make this up if I tried. You remember how we had to start buying meat due to ineffective meat management here on our farm? Yeah. That really worked out well.

Before we go any further. THIS IS A TOTALLY GROSS POST. YOU MIGHT BARF! YOU MAY START SCREAMING! YOU MIGHT ACTUALLY RUN FOR YOUR LIFE. DO NOT CONTINUE IF YOU ARE SQUEAMISH OR MAYBE HAVEN'T HAD BREAKFAST. I'm not kidding! Some of this was too much to for me and I actually like butchering. Srsly. Last warning. You might want to look deep into Little Mo's lovely and calming eyes and meditate on his beautiful little paws.

First, a picture of my happy meats. They were out toddling around in the fresh air and sunshine. If you scroll any further it's on you. Not kidding. You've been warned.

My meats are happy...... and they sing.

So the other day I was in town and I needed to find something for dinner so fine. I'll just buy meat, I thought. I walked away and went back to the refrigerated meat case in the store three times. I finally just got the cheapest, best package of split fryer breasts and stomped off to pay too much for them. $6.31.

Several nights later we needed to make dinner. Fine. This is what I found:

Ew!

Green Muscle Disease. In the first pack of store chicken I've bought since February.  What are the odds?

Are you kidding me!?!!

Yes. I was very mad. And grossed out. I stood there angrily staring at the epic store meat failure - the echos of everyone who ever sneered, made fun of, or laughed at us for "doing all that work" by raising our own meat. You know why we do this? Because my freakin'-store-meat is disgusting.

In truth I was a little conflicted. As a producer (for our own use only) I know that these things happen. However, someone needs to get their crap together. Clearly the inspection processes need some revision. Or maybe it's a supplier problem. I don't know.

How do regular people react to this?

But I was wondering what would happen if a "regular" person got this package of meat? Would they know what it was? Would they freak out? Would they call the TV station and go on air proclaiming emotional damage? What would you do? Do you know what this is?

We've had a few cases of Green Muscle Disease. It happens in meat chickens and turkeys. Basically it happens when the blood supply is restricted to that part of the chest muscle. Sometimes it is blamed on... wing flapping. Yes. Creepy meats are so creepy that flapping their wings - just like every other normal chicken - might cause this. Check out their recommendations - minimal light, don't walk around too much when you go and bring out your dead meat chickens, and don't mow to close to the flocks.

Wait... wut? Bring out the dead meat chickens? What am I talking about? Oh.. sorry. You mean you don't know how industrial meat chickens are raised? Here. Let this video warm your heart. THIS IS A GRAPHIC VIDEO AND YOU MIGHT START CRYING. Even I had to hide my face in Nicholas's soft fur when I watched it. You want cheap, industrialized meat? You got it.  

So....did that video get your attention?  For what it's worth, that farmer got his for exposing the secret life of creepy meats. He seemed like a nice man. I do not know if he is still in business or not. But you can see that he's just a regular guy and he legitimately seemed to care about those birds.

Are you still wondering why we raise our own meat?

Yesterday I worked outside near the garage where we are housing our little meat balls. My meat chickens flapped their little ineffective wings all they wanted, they were soaking up the sun, and I made plenty of noise. The worst thing that happened to them was that the geese tried to bother them - but I scooted those honkers away. And a wolf was watching their every move. Kai thinks the meats are the best show in town. Aside from that our meats are very happy.

Our rate of Green Muscle Disease is very low. It's so low we don't officially track it - but it's kind of surprising so I remember when it happens.  Mostly we find it in older meat hens - like 3 or 4 months old...and our worst run of Green Muscle Disease was probably 3 out of 25 birds. But those ladies were were so "old" that they had started laying eggs.

I can assure you that the meat in that package was not 3 or 4 months old. Industrialized meats are butchered at about 49 days. Based on my experience that was about right for the size of the breasts. That seems to be a hard 49 days for a little chicken who isn't suppose to flap his wings.

Are you still wondering why we raise our own meat?

What do you do when you find Green Muscle Disease in your meats? After hopping around screaming, "GROSS!" um... usually just throw that part away. Technically you can trim around it and use the rest of the meat. Or trim it and give the good part to the dogs. If it grosses you out too much then just toss the whole thing.. or to be less wasteful just throw away the breasts and take off the rear quarters.

What do you do when you get it in a package of store meat?

Take it back.

I marched determinedly back to the store, gross meat in hand, and slapped that pack of gross meat up on the counter. By the time I got done explaining the what's and why's the helpful young man behind the counter was just about as green as the muscle in that industrialized meat. He didn't even look at it.

"Store credit?" He asked hopefully. Of course I didn't have a receipt, I paid cash, but since it was the store's brand of meat it's not like he could argue with me.

"Yep." I said.

I warned him strongly that he needed to show that bad meat to his meat manager. While I didn't have any hard feelings toward that store (which my attorneys have warned me not to name in this post) I did tell him that we would no longer be buying meat from that store. We would, however, continue to be big purchasers of cat food. He just nodded, a little stunned and possibly confused.

I headed back toward pet food and thought that maybe we could celebrate telling store meat to screw off once and for all by having canned dog food day for the Dog Horde. I left the store meat free.

So now what?  Much better meat management. Technically our meats are done and even tho we traditionally grow them out a little more we will begin our rolling meat harvest very soon. Store meat? No thank you.

If you are still with me - and haven't started crying or stopped following my on your blog list... and are wondering what you can do to avoid gross industrial meat? You can raise your own meat. Can anybody do it? Yes you can. Just give it a try. You might still end up with some Green Muscle Disease but at least you know your meat was happy.

What do you think, folks? Are you going to give raising your own meat a try? I keep thinking about all those folks out there, going about their business thinking that industrial food is safe and clean. They may have just been fooling themselves. I got news for you, naysayers, I'm not sure it's as great as you think.

Warning and a disclaimer: Let's be very clear here, people, we do NOT talk about animal right issues here. We do not promote or encourage an extreme vegetarianism position. We are shameless carnivores and we like meat. We like butchering. We teach folks how to raise and butcher their own meat. If you have something terrible to say I will NOT publish your comment. If you send me a mean email I will delete it, make fun of you to my real friends, and never think about you again. If you crap up my facebook page with bad comments I'll just block you.  If you just want to fight and don't have anything positive to contribute then go and tell all your lousy friends about it because I do not want your negativity. Have legitimate questions? Sure. If you are that idiot who threatened me because of my chicken murdering ways then know that the only reason I didn't report you to local law enforcement was because you sounded like a twelve year old girl. Thanks for the laugh. Anonymous, negative comments will be tossed in the trash.

Folks who actually want to have a discussion.... If you are a regular person and you got a package of meat like this, what would you do? I honestly don't even know anymore how I'd react because we've been doing this for so long. I'd love to hear how you'd handle it.

Happy Monday everyone! I don't know about you but I'm going to go out and hug my creepy meats. Then I'm going to have them over for dinner.

#nevergiveupneversurrender

I am the last person to let go of summer. Fall-schmall..... love the color October? No. I love summer. Sum-sum-summertime. I will wear shorts until the snow flies. I will never willingly embrace stupid fall or gleefully skip around yelling, "Winter is coming!" like someone I know.

This is not me.

So all y'all have absolutely no proof that this was actually me sitting by the fire yesterday. None. Zero. I don't know who those dogs are but they are not Kai and Zander.

I don't know who's nose that is. But I smooched it. I mean... "someone" smooched it.

Yesterday's super-sucky rain and 40*-ish windchill made everyone unhappy. But this week we are going to have beautiful, warm, sunny, 70* days and mild evenings. I might even need to turn on the air conditioning.

It's still summer. I will never give up! Never surrender!
#nevergiveupneversurrender

That is all.

Limpy the Chicken Gets A Fake Leg

Last nite my husband and I watched a news story about a woman in Massachusetts who is paying $2500 for a lame chicken to get a 3D printed prosthetic leg. We were eating roast rooster while we were watching. We didn't even feel bad.

Let's say this up front, I'm always glad when someone is so tenderhearted that they go above and beyond for animals they love. Thank heaven that the woman in the story has so much love in her heart. Right?

It is also a fact that Zander's jaw dropping dental surgery was extremely expensive...and I don't even think I ever told you about Nicholas's $800 tail.... and it is a fact that we get a special rate from our vet because of all the business we bring to them from whatever weird thing our Dog Horde or The Insane Cat Posse has come up with. So we get it. Really.

Usually I don't make fun of people. But this was the exception.We had a lot of hilarity over this on the facebook.... a lot of hilarity. One of my pals suggested "some duct tape and a Popsicle stick" while another had a bag of frozen chicken legs in their freezer and maybe they could do a transplant.

For our part we couldn't stop laughing. If we ever actually went out and spent all that money on Clucky to get a fake leg it is virtually guaranteed that the next day - the very next day - we'd go out there and Clucky would be hanging out of Kai's mouth while Dog#1 and Zander played 'keep-away' with that expensive fake leg as Lucky ran around and circles exclaiming, 'Oh I can't believe it!'

$2500 would buy a lot of new chickens is all we are saying. We would never spend that kind of money on livestock - especially a $2 chicken.

It's a crazy world, folks, someone oughta sell tickets.

Happy Tuesday everyone!

Your 4th of July PSA.....

We had a particularly hard day yesterday so I've got nothing to add to my yearly 4th of July Public Service announcement. You can read it here. And no, no one likes your stupid fireworks. 

 Unlike the stupid fireworks and bottle rockets, I never get tired of gathering eggs in my shirt.

It it insane to me that there we need warning labels on a hammer to advise you not to hit yourself in the head with it... but folks are perfectly willing to let a 3 year old hold a 1200* sparkler. You can't ride a bike without a helmet but explosives in your yard? Sure, what not.

It's not just curmudgeony old folks like me who don't like fireworks.... I know at least one combat veteran who is about to have a very very hard day and night. So look around and think about the folks around you before you grab the lighter and run right out there. Or better yet, just enjoy one of the professional displays in a nearby community.

Or even better yet, stay home and repent for annoying your neighbors with your stupid fireworks. It will be a hard hard day if this is the year the stupid neighbors burn down our chicken house with their stupid fireworks.

That's all I have to say about it.

*OFG grumbles some more about stupid fireworks and goes outside to check all the gates and fences*

You may never know where your meat comes from...

In the latest from the category of "Good luck, suckers".... does everyone know this is going on? The WTO decided that our "country of origin" meat labeling requirements are discriminatory. They they want to get rid of them. Apparently we are going along with it.

I love you, little food independence meats!

Let that sink in. Every tshirt you purchase has to say where it is from - as does seafood. And you really want to know where your dog treats come from....but meat? Nope. Could all be a big surprise.

What gives? Canada and Mexico are in a snit because they think US consumers may not want "grown in Canada" meat. Add to that the meat packers have to implement costly record keeping and processing changes to keep the Mexican pork away from grown in Iowa chops.... so someone decided just to get rid of the country of origin labeling.

They are trying to make this out as a marketing issue but isn't it a food safety issue? Don't you as the consumer want to know - and don't you deserve to know - where your food comes from?

Think about it - just about every carrot needs to be bar coded (everyone remembers the new "food safety regs, right?) but meat? Nah... we'll just trust you. I'm sure everything will be fine.

*OFG runs outside and hugs her meat chickens to her bosom.*

I hate to take the wind out of Mexico and Canada's sails... but sorry neighbors, we aren't worried about your products.

Did everyone just forget that a Chinese company purchased Smithfield - the US largest pork producers?

Are we just ignoring the fact that the USDA gave the go ahead for chicken to be processed in China?

Food safety-smood safety. I'm sure this will  all work out just fine....right?

If you really want to put your tin foil hat on... then draw some dots on over to the avian flu...which just came out of no where..... they still don't know how it got started or how it is being spread around. 

OK maybe that is going to far but honestly. We are the most advanced country in the world and we can barely get our food production right. Why the heck are we just going to hand our food production over to anyone else?

Of course if you are concerned you can always purchase your meat locally... unless a neighbor gets a bee in their bonnet and calls the authorities on your farmer because they don't have a heated barn. That guy still doesn't have his horses or dogs back...and he still has to go back to court.

The whole thing just burns my biscuits. Food security, that is keeping food production in this country, is an extremely important issue. If you are not invested in this discussion, now is the time to get involved.

Friends, don't just go along with this kind of malarkey.  Consumer Reports has a link to voice your concerns.  There is a feedback form here.

Here are a few more articles:

New York Daily News

AP news

Star Tribune/Valley News

Usually non-farm friends look at you like you are out of your mind when you start to talk about how "they" are trying to control food production and are trying to take food production out of your backyard. But I don't know - this kind of news, I hope, will make folks think about their food and where it comes from. It all just sounds like funny business.

I don't know about you but I'll be working on getting set up for pigz.. and ordering another round of meat chickens.

Happy Monday everyone... and good luck, suckers.

Don't think this can't happen to you - West Wind Acres

Has everyone been following the story of West Wind Acres? They are a farm in New York who sell pasture raised meat products. Or at least they did. The owner was arrested and now they are facing charges in court - for having farm animals outside and for having frozen water buckets. Think that sounds crazy? So do I.

Nibbles believes she is being abused. She wants someone to rescue her. Not going to happen.

I don't know those folks and I've never been to their farm.  But I saw the news footage and I looked at the pictures and I have to tell you - this seems ridiculous. I also know folks who are friends with the farmer and say this is totally uncalled for.  You can read more about the situation on their blog and also here, and here, and here is a newspaper article, and here (scroll down to the March 19th post called Something Wicked West Wind Comes).

The other bloggers listed above laid out the situation and why the charges of abuse are ridiculous. Do I think that having farm animals outside is abuse? Nope. Even if it's really cold? Nope. Honestly, if he has a pasture operation and the worst thing that has happened over this brutal winter is a little frostbite, I think he is doing OK. Winters are hard. Farming is hard. Not everything is ideal.

Conventional farmers get criticized for raising animals inside. This guy has been arrested for having his animals outside. What on earth is happening?

What concerns me is the basis for these charges - that they had frozen waterers, there was poop in the water, and the animals were outside. Friend, I have news for you - we ALL have had frozen waterers. It wouldn't matter if I hung the buckets two inches from the ceiling, I guarantee that the goats would poop in in. And yes, farm animals live outside just fine.

They didn't have a heated barn? Who the hell has a heated barn? That is insane. The very last thing you want to do is heat a barn. Livestock bedding is entirely flammable, animals create dust, an enclosed space without fresh air causes respiratory problems. Why on earth would you heat your barn?

Lest this spiral into an argument about what is and is not abuse let's instead focus on why this matters to you. 

Don't think for a second this can't happen to you.

Go thru and read the comments on West Wind's blog, check out their facebook page, and see the comments on the other blog sites. Everyone has some ridiculous story about a busy body who calls the cops on their farm.

My favorite one was the gal who had the cops come out because her ducks were outside. In the rain.

Are you shaking your head? You should be.

As far as I can tell this started with an anonymous tip. Some busy body got a bee in their bonnet about these guys and I can pretty much bet it's someone who doesn't know about farming. There's one in every crowd and that crowd is getting bigger. Not every do-gooder is doing good.

Everyone who has animals has a story.

My favorite story of "abuse" that I personally witnessed was when I was in town one day. One of my Amish neighbors was also there and I was watching him park his buggy behind one of the businesses. About the same time this guy walks up with his family - I guarantee you he'd never been to a farm nor had he ever done a day's hard work in his life.

"What's THAT!" He exclaimed to no one in particular, least of all me. He was pointing to the horse and buggy.

"Well, that's a horse, Fred." Said someone else.

"THAT'S a horse?" Said Fred scratching his head and looking amazed. Then he stood there for a second.

"That horse doesn't have any water! That's abuse!" Said Fred.

I had to walk away. If that guy could not even identify an animal as a horse then he certainly is not qualified to determine if it is abused or not.

You hear about this all the time. I knew a cattle guy in B.C who had the cops called on him every summer because the city folks would go out driving around and see his dairy cows. They'd panic because these newly-appointed-experts didn't know that seeing the hip bones on dairy cows is normal.

Or the uproar I saw online one time about some baby cows who were penned in a barn and they didn't even have any water!!!! Lean in friend, imma put some learning on you.... baby cows drink milk. Maybe these horrified onlookers thought that the calves were older then they were because a newborn calf can weigh up to 100lbs...but that "little" baby needs milk not an open bucket of water.

There was a case a while ago about some folks who had all their small livestock seized. Their crime was that they had an ugly property. One of the charges was that they didn't have enough feed on hand. How much feed are you supposed to have one hand? Do you know where we store our feed? At the feed store. It's three miles away and open 6 out of 7 days of the week. They are much better equipped to store feed than we are so we only keep about a weeks worth at a time. Is that a crime?

As for that guy's livestock guardian dogs being outside, I can't speak to why they didn't have their dog tags but that does not seem like a hanging offense - that sounds like a ticket and a fine. Dogs outside in the winter? Talk to someone who actually has LGDs (Livestock Guardian Dogs) and just see if they can keep the dogs inside and away from their flocks. As odd as it may seem to you not every dog is a pampered pet. Some of them are working dogs and some of them live outside just fine.

There is a world of difference between a heavy bodied, double coated Nordic-style dog like Kai who loves to be out in the snow and doesn't want to come inside....and the no-good-nick neighbor who puts his 30 pounds or less short coated poodley mix outside for the day when he goes to work in the winter.

The worst part about this story was that the farmer had his own vet come out and check the condition on the animals. She said they were fine but not even her assessment could keep the sheriff from coming back and seizing some of the animals. It's pretty frightening to think your own vet can't protect you. I tell you the truth, there is a world of difference between a vet who works primarily with small companion animals and one who has experience with livestock.

So what can you do?

Be careful who you trust. This poor farmer honestly thought he was doing the right thing by inviting anyone who wanted to come out to see his farm. He allowed the police to walk around his property to check things out.

To tell you the truth, I don't believe in transparency in all matters. Most people are so far removed from farming, farms, and food production they don't have any concept of what animals do and do not need. There was an article in one of those online newspapers not too long ago about a commercial butchering operation. The comments were filled with gasps and horrified folks...and I was all, "Wow! Look at their great tools! Check out their set up!"

City mouse, country mouse both looking at the same thing and seeing it entirely with different eyes.

I know a goat guy who's barn is nicer than some people's homes. But every year... every stinkin' year here come the rescue people to come and buy up his goat babies and take them away for the horror that is the best barn in 3 counties. Rescue them from what? Every day Nibbles asks me if she can go and live with that guy's herd.

Be careful about who you let on your property.

You may not just show up at our place. I've had folks who don't even know me by name want to come out and look around. Nope. You never know what someone' intentions are or why they are really there.

As it is it took us 3 years, a locking gate, and 4 dogs each over 100 lbs to keep people from just driving up on our property. There was a business here before we bought this place and it was very tough to keep the lookyloos from just making themselves at home.

Get a gate and lock it.

Keep your animals in the back of the property.

You might also want to find an attorney who is experienced in agricultural issues - just to have in your back pocket in case you need it.

You might want to get a game cam set up to keep an eye on the coming's and going's at your place. Just in case. 

Know your rights. What if the authorities show up and want to look around? You don't have to let them on your property without a warrant. What does the warrant do? Well, for one it makes sure that someone else (the judge) provide some oversight...but more than that it gives you time to call your Ag experienced attorney and have them get over to your place to be present if the situation arises.

As West Wind found out the hard way - most people talk to much and are too helpful when the authorities show up. There is a fine line between cooperating and talking your self into being arrested.

This family now has to defend themselves in court. Justice is expensive, as they are finding out. You can check out their gofundme page here.

Now before anyone starts hopping around. Yes, animal abuse exists. There are bad people everywhere. There are hard working folks doing rescue work that really matters. But there is a world of difference between a dog fighting ring and pigs on pasture. Robust Livestock Guardian Dogs living out with their herds are a world away from some poor dog tied to a tree and being left to starve to death.

You know how I feel about argumentative comments so let's not finger point or "oh yeah" each other on this - let's focus on why this case is important to all of us. Don't think for a minute that this can't happen to you.

Happy Monday everyone. There is a lot to think about.

Lather...rinse...repeat...

Another day, another record low "high" for the day (9* it already happened), windchills well below zero, everyone is stuck inside. We are supposed to be around 40* at this time of year not gripped in a Siberian cold snap. No one is happy.

*insert more complaining about cold here*

*complain about winter chores here*

*be glad only the turkey died and that it was NOT my fault here*

*include adorable picture of dogs playing in snow here*

*lamely suggest that we can make it just a little while longer here*

*resort to binging on 'the netflix' and pudding here*

The  Lather...rinse repeat.....

  Let's just think about summer.

*sigh*

Not Everything Works Out

So this happened the other day. 

Sometimes things don't go right. Don't take it personally.

And then yesterday was a humdinger. Not only did I get zapped by the electric fence while mowing.... I was standing in a patch of poison ivy when I did it. It was not exhilarating in a good way. I went in the house and had some ice cream.

It got me thinking, tho, about how not everything works out. But that's OK. Not everything in life is going to go perfectly. How you react to non-perfect days can largely determine the course of your life - and the that of the folks around you.

Are you a club thrower, road rager, food server curser, chronic complainer, teller of woes, fault finder? Do you go thru life enumerating every wrong that has been done to you? Do you rehearse every slight, insult, offense? Do you come home and tell your spouse about every single person who parked badly, cut you off, or heaven forbid had too many items in the express check out lane?

Baby, why the rage? Aren't you tired of exhausting yourself with that misery?

I'm not superstitious and I don't believe in astrology... but being that it is a Friday the 13th, and the full moon, and apparently we have some big solar flares going on.... it could get a little nutty out there. So I'm just going to gently and lovingly suggest that everyone gear down a bit and try to give each other a break today.

What if, instead of assuming that bad parker is just a jerk, what if you imagined a situation where the person next to them parked badly so they had to scoot over...and the next person had to scoot over, and so by the time you showed up it was just a series of scootin' over and not a vast conspiracy just to ruin your day?

What if there was absolutely no one around at the check out so the grocery gal called the next customer over, and in an attempt to be nice, invited the person with 14 items to use the "12 items or less" express line. And then you happened to come up to that line. Instead of scowling, or even scolding them, what if you just shrugged it off?

What if you didn't write some crappy, negative comment if you didn't agree with the poster? What if you just scrolled right on by and didn't give it another thought?  What if you didn't correct someone's spelling, or more likely, their bad typing?

I'm always dumbfounded by folks who are so outraged, so offended, so personally wounded when every little thing doesn't go their way. I'm not talking about big things like an illness, or being laid off, or not getting the job. I'm just talking about someone who is mad because they don't like the cheese on their salad, or if someone is in "their" spot, or if they happen to get in the check out line with the trainee.

Instead of going out of your way to be offended how's about if we all go out of our way to be kind to each other? Let's all do this for no reason other than we all just need a break today. Kindness is contagious so let's sprinkle it all over today.

Let's all thank the trainee for doing a great job (even if you have to choke those words out), let's respond with "whatever is easiest for you" when they ask paper or plastic, let's park further out so that a mom with her kids or an older person can have that up close parking spot.  Let's give encouragement to someone starting a new project (instead of telling them how they are doing it wrong and it will never work), let's reach out to someone who could use a friend, let's open doors for each other, let's look someone in the eye and smile, or just hold back any negative thought comment or action.

What do you think? Do you need a break? Are you giving someone else a break? Not everything is going to work out but at least we can try to help each other along.

Happy Friday the 13th! Look out for looniness and solar flares!

Nibbles' Epic Milk

In honor of this story today - thanks FDA really you're doing a superduper job - I'm making cheese. From raw milk. If you are to believe all the horrors that the FDA is spewing then I'll likely die.... probably from deliciousness.

Wow what a milk!

Nibble had an epic milk this morning. Check it out - it was over eight cups!

Thanks Nibs! Check in tomorrow to see if I died.

Happy Sunday everyone!

What to Know Before You Get a Goat

We are looking down the barrel of Goat-a-palooza 2014 sometime in the next 10 days. Due to poor planning and lack of foresight all four of our full sized goats (Debbie, Dahli, Daisy, and Darla) will be due on about the same day. Soon.

Two of four pregnant girls. Zoikes!

It's finally sinking in that one day I will have 4 big goats... and the next day I'll have at the least 8 goats. Or 12. Or 16. Or worse.

So I'll need to sharpen up on my marketing skills to sell all those moneymakers... I mean, doelings. There is a strong possibility that we will keep the buckings for the first annual Goat BBQ this fall. But we'll see how that goes.

Selling animals on Craigslist is easy enough. But sometimes you want to be a little more careful. I've had two livestock sales that I deeply regretted and one that still makes me mad. So to make it easier on buyers and sellers here are a few things that newbie and wannabe goat owners should know:

1. Know what you are getting into. Do your research first. If your first question to me is, "What should I feed the goat?" I'll thank you for your time and no, I'm not selling this little goatie to you. There are some great resources online and  you should buy and read this book. The fact is, I don't know if I would have sold me Nibs and her sister... I'm not sure I was entirely ready but at least we knew were to look for answer and we knew who to talk to if we had questions.

2. I am not arranging any financial transactions with your kid. I don't care if your 12 year old is mature - you as the adult need to contact me and be responsible for any livestock I sell to you. YOU need to manage the bottle feeding of a 3 day old goat, not your child.

3. Your fencing isn't good enough. Nope, I don't even need to see it. But I assure you that it needs some work. Ask anyone who owns goats that this will be your toughest problem.

4. The initial cost to buy this goatie is not going to be your biggest expense. Due to some changes in Ohio's livestock care laws I am not longer taking responsibility for shots or any other young goat vet care. You will need to find a vet, get your new goat vaccinated, decide immediately if you want to get your newly acquired goat disbudded or dehorned, and when or if appropriate get your buckling neutered.

5. You need more than one goat. I don't care if you are going to carry this little goatie around in your purse and she's going to be your BFF. Goats are herd creatures and it will go badly if you only have just one. If you have just one, that little goatie will become a problem... a loud, destructive problem... and you will just dump it at the shelter - or worse.

6. There is no way on this green Earth I am selling you a doeling if you are a single man, living in city, with zero farm or livestock experience . No way. Now how. Nope. Creeper.

7. No take backs. This isn't Nordstroms and you aren't buying a Mercedes. There is no return policy so you'd better be sure about your purchase. I had someone who wanted me to take back some ducks because "they weren't emotionally bonded to them." No. Just... no. Aside from those folks having unreasonable expectations - and being weirdos - there are real bio-security issues with having livestock returned to your property. So... no. I'm not taking back your $5 duck because he won't snuggle you.

8. If you don't show up to the arranged meeting place you will not get a second chance. Sure I'll sit there and wait for you. As long as you keep me updated on your progress I'll wait for a good long time. But if you just don't show up then I"ll assume that you aren't responsible enough for livestock.

Mostly I've had good experiences with folks I've met thru livestock sales. But the bad ones... well. That regret stays with you for a while. There are never any guarantees so once that critter leaves your hands all you can really do is try to screen out the weirdos.... and hope it goes well for your livestock once they leave your possession.

As for now, I need to do a whole lot of shoveling out and cleaning up as we get ready for Goat Avalanche 2014. It's going to be a wild ride!  Who wants to buy a goatie?  No weirdos, no creepers, and no take backs.

Happy Friday everyone!


Editor's note:  Yikes! I snuck in an affiliate link to my Amazon store. But really this is a great book and if you have goats you should get it. Remember, anything you buy from Amazon by clicking on these links gets me a tiny percentage of the sale. If you like this blog, or if I've helped you at all in your farming efforts, just make a purchase from Amazon from one of the links, my store, or the black Amazon search box on the right side of this page. You can buy anything - hopefully something you need anyway. 

MI - What Is the Matter With You?

Seriously, Michigan? What is the matter with you?

Has everyone seen this? I hate to sound like one of those crazy conspiracy people but seriously, Michigan, why can't you get this right? It's not like there isn't plenty of free space up there. Why the farm hatin'? 

You'd think with as much economic strife that state has had they would have better things to do then run backyard beekeepers and folks with a few hens out of production. Don't you think they'd want their folks to invest in food production? I got news for you Michigan, the only property value you should be concerned with is that big city of yours.

As for the folks who are just trying to farm - maybe what you need is better marketing. I guess old ideas about how farming is "dirty" just won't die. Maybe we can come up with some catchy slogans like, "Backyard farming - our sh!t don't stink!" or maybe "Come on now, everybody compost!" or "Chickens and bunnies -  cute and snugly until they come to dinner!"  Well. Maybe that last one needs some work...

But my point is - what are you so afraid of, Michigan? That your citizens use some of that abandon property to grow some food and help themselves? That you might tackle that problem of food deserts in your cities?

You would think that Michigan would want to encourage small farm-based businesses and self reliance so why they are so concerned about "nuisance" animals encroaching on their neighbors is beyond me.

But who knows. As weird as it is for folks like us to try and understand why someone would be mad at a front yard garden.... that's how weird the complainers think we are. The difference, I guess, is in priorities.

When I lived in my West Coast in-city home one of my neighbors had a breakdown over my compost pile. To be clear - I didn't compost food or any kind of manure - just some leaves. Seriously they had a break down over it and built a fence to block out that small pile of leaves in the back corner of my property... then promptly set up an above ground pool directly outside my living room window, trolleyed their TV outside, and I spent the entire stinkin' summer listening to them watch Jeopardy while they were splashing around in the water. I ask you - who was more annoying? Silent leaves composting or the cocktail hour wading pool?

I dunno. I asked this over on the facebook, am I really just getting to be an old fuddy duddy or are things getting worse? Some of us think it's getting worse. As for Michigan -  good luck, suckers. You are only making your problems worse.

What about you - are you an old fuddy duddy? Or do you have a slogan that Michigan farmers could use to improve their situation?

Happy Tuesday everyone!