Pigs. Not in the frezer.

You know... sometimes life is very frustrating. The other day I went downstairs to get something out of the freezer and everything was thawed out. AGAIN! I panicked. I swore. I hurried up and sorted out what was still mostly frozen and what wasn't. I couldn't believe we had another freezer fail.

Remember this foolishness from over the summer?

I ended up with about six packages of meat that were mostly thawed out. I didn't want to try and refreeze them... that would deteriorate the quality. So I just put them in our coldest fridge and we are working our way thru them. I was very mad. Very, very mad.

Thank heavens we didn't butcher the pigz yet!

When my husband got home we investigated the situation and we determined the cause of the freezer fail was..... cats. It seems our Gate Diablo is trying to work against us. Some how he (or Moose) stepped on the button on the power strip the freezer was plugged into...and turned it off. I must have been off for days and neither of us noticed.

We cursed ourselves that we didn't take one pal's suggestion and get and get a freezer alarm.

But believe me we have learned our lesson. And we moved the power strip so little paws can't turn it off again.We've also been eating our way thru all that meat. Fortunately we had divided up the pork we just butchered so there were only several packages and not most of a pig.

And this?

But my roasted corn and all those peppers are pretty much doomed. We are going to use them - but the quality is kind of poor. So I'll be using the corn in a corn pudding and such.

In the meantime, the pigz are still out there. We haven't gotten our ducks in a row to have a butcher day.  First I was too sick, then we needed to get another freezer to replace the one that really died.....and now it's going to be too warm this weekend. The one time I really need it to be 20* and it may not even be freezing!

So we are just going to keep moving along.

Happy Tuesday everyone! Did one of your cats turn off your freezer? Are you eating meat, meat, meat, and more meat because of it?


Editors note: Hey did you order something  from Amazon thru one of the links or my store? THANK YOU SO MUCH! I never know who orders what but I really appreciate it. Someone bought something big - you know who you are but I don't. I'm sending you hugs and many many thanks. 

Do you need to do some online shopping? You can just give a click or use the black Amazon search box on the side of the page. If you do I will get a tiny portion of the sale. If you like this blog, or if I've helped you at all in your farming efforts, just make a purchase from Amazon from one of the links, my store, or the black Amazon search box on the right side of this page. THANKS!

Goats: Mission Accomplished!

Mercifully, I believe that we are now done with goat breeding for this season. Yesterday was a goat-a-rific day. And by that I mean it was horrible and I'm glad it's over.

 Goatherd.

We loaded up Debbie and Daisy and headed over to the farm near us to visit that terrific Alpine buck and his sidekick. We should have been there for exactly 10 minutes. Things did not work out as we expected.

I have to hand it to Daisy. She was done in 2 minutes. The little buck I renamed, "Mr. Wonderful" got the job done and without further ado I handed Daisy's leash to my husband and he walked her out of the goat pen. Check.

Then there was Debbie. Yes, she was in heat. Yes, she knows how this goes. No, she would not cooperate. We all ended up trying to hold her. It was terrible. I can't believe we skipped church for that. I'm very sure that what happened in that buck pen, and my participation, are a smiting offense. Ew.

The buck owners were very sympathetic and resorted to baby talk to try and calm Debbie down. That is not how I do things. I went directly to Yosemite Sam. I informed Debbie to quit goofing around and get over there and get her business taken care of. She didn't. There was running, a chase, more foolishness. I just about gave up.

I told the nice folks that maybe we should just come back tomorrow. I think Debbie heard me and panicked because then she got her business taken care of. I handed over the buck fee, we loaded up the goats, and drove away covered in buck stank and irritation.

I got home, burned my clothes, beached everything else, and applied bourbon to my day. It took the edge off.

If things go according to plan then the due dates should be:

Daisy:  April 30th
Debbie: April 27 - May 1

We bred the goats pretty darn late last year... but the extreme cold at the end of the season made us glad that we did. That is one of the reasons we waited again so long this time. Also, these due dates are closer to the time where there will be a lot of bramble leafing out...and only about a month away from the first hay cutting.

We aren't overly concerned about selling the kids - especially since we found out how easy it is to take them to the auction. If Debbie has a doeling I might consider keeping her as a future milker. The buck came from really good milking lines - and had pretty interesting coloring. So we'll see.

Nibs. Outstanding in her field. She's a pip, isn't she?

What about Nibs? No dice. We think that she has performed admiraly during her tenure here and now she can just relax. But mostly because if we have three gals who can milk a gallon a day (Deb, Dahli, and Daisy) there really isn't any reason to have Nibs and her "maybe a quart or so" production. We thank Nibbles for all her years of service, will give her a lovely pen as a token of our thanks, and then put her out to pasture. And really... we mean pasture. From now on she can just be outstanding in her field. And maybe work on that attitude.

Happy Monday everyone! Did you miss church because of goat breeding?

My new favorite salad. And goats.

Have you used up all your leftovers? We finally either got thru all of ours or put them in the freezer. You remember that we kind of had a late Tday.
 

 All the lovely flavors of Thanksgiving.

Even tho I had to hang up my lettuce bucket for the season..... I still love salad. Even if I have to buy lettuce. Luckily I still have some parsley and greens going in the green house. But that is about it.

This is my version of a cobb salad crossed with a chopped salad. I don't know what it is, but I just really like chopped salad. Maybe it's that there are no weird, hard to eat, huge pieces of lettuce falling off my fork. Turkey, lettuce, onion, parsley, blue cheese, hard boiled egg (technically this is a mustard egg), a spoon full of cranberries (why not?), and some mayo in a nice big bowl....

Tossed.

.... then mix it up. I like to use kitchen tongs to give it a toss. Don't forget salt and pepper.

I gave up on bottled salad dressing a long time ago. Anymore it just tastes like corn syrup. Sometimes I'll make an easy ranch dressing. Mayo, sour cream, a little buttermilk and then seasoned with an Italian seasoning mix - shaken together in a pint jar. But now I've even gotten further away from that. I think we've all learned that salad is just a vehicle for a lot of dressing. But once you focus on the tastes of the greens and the ingredients you start to wonder what you saw in store bought dressing.

If you like a creamy salad then a little bit of mayo or sour cream will set you up. I think the difference is seasoning the greens so it's not boring. And bacon. Salad should have bacon. I didn't have any bacon in this salad because I used it in something else. But next time there will be bacon... oh yes there will be.

Aside from making a big salad today we are also taking the goats to be bred. I hope this works. More on this after we have achieved or objective... or wasted our time and gas on goats being ridiculous.

Happy Sunday everyone! Do you still have home grown greens or do you have to buy lettuce?

Nicholas's Hard Day #10

This picture defines my life with Nicholas lately. It is a story of woe and hardship. And him trying to steal the food right off my plate.

Soon. 

Nicholas had a very, very hard day recently. It included a trip to the emergency vet and a follow up to our Good Vet. He suffered humiliations galore. Unfortunately,  the vet staff at the ER also suffered. I told them he was a fighter and a biter but they didn't believe me. When I heard their screams I yelled to them to "get the gloves." I wasn't kidding.

We went home with a sack full of medication and a warning to "bring a muzzle for that puma" the next time we came in. Fortunately our Good Vet knows how to handle our Nicholas so the follow up visit went much better.

 Nicholas lives large. Real large.

"Go and get that scale and prepare to be amazed!" I declared to the vet tech. I was close to victory. The months of hard work were about to pay off. I was smug in the face of my success.

I hauled Nicholas's huge carcass out of our biggest carrier and plomped him down on the scale.

"Yeah. Twenty pounds and..." Said the vet tech.

"WHAT!?!?! No! No, that can't be right!" I was confused.

"The ER vet said he was 19 pounds. That is his goal weight We needed to get him down to 19 pounds!"

"DOWN to 19 pounds?" She asked incredulously.

"Yes, yes, yes... see here?" I snatched the chart out of her hands. "Remember when he was 23 pounds and Dr. M said that we needed to get him down to 19 pounds? We did it! We did it!"

She just shook her head. "Maybe next time."

He wears the weight well. I mean... look how fluffy he is.

I was defeated. Surely there was some mistake. For months Nicholas has suffered near starvation every single day. I know because of the constant complaining. Every morning he comes in to get me out of bed by throwing his huge self on top of me. It's like having a bear lay across your chest.

"Get off me, Fatty Pancake!" I try and shove him off but inevitably he resorts to cannibalism and starts gnawing on my fingers. It has been grueling.

Such as been my life with Nicholas. We cut his food ration, we portion it out, we make him share, we scatter dry food on the floor so it takes him longer to eat, we take up any left over dog food..and heaven knows he can't get up on the counters.

"Well," She said hopefully, "All scales are a little different so maybe....."

And then I didn't hear her anymore. We would just have to keep working to get our biggest cat down to a more reasonable size. More food portioning, more running laps up and down the hall, more of me carrying him down the stairs to he has to run back up.... but we can do it.

Nicholas will just need to have more hard days. This has been the 10th. We can do this.

Nicholas's Hard Day #1
Nicholas's Hard Day #2
Nicholas's Hard Day #3
Nicholas's Hard Day #4
Nicholas's Hard Day #5
Nicholas's Hard Day #6 
Nicholas's Hard Day #7
Nicholas's Hard Day#8
Nicholas's Hard Day #9

Happy Friday everyone! Do you have a jumbo sized cat? Are you trying to get him down to 19 pounds?

Top 10 First Time Butcher Day Tips

One of my pals is going to butcher chickens for the first time this weekend. They have done a terrific job of raising those creepy meat chickens, have done all the research, have all the tools..... but I'm sure they are still a little nervous. Everyone is the first time they butcher.

My chicken butchering tools. This is all I need.

So here are my top 10 tips for your first ever butcher day. I hope this helps.

10. Get your tools ready. Before you march boldly out there, get your tools ready. My best tool list is located here at the bottom of the post. I put all my knives on a big baking tray along with my paper towels. If you think you might be grossed out by touching something icky then get some gloves. I use the regular kitchen style gloves.

9. Get your "dispatch" workstation ready. We use an axe for our poultry. We've tried hanging them and cutting the throats, but for us, this takes too long for the bird to expire. We want a clean, fast kill. We have the axe sharpened, the block up on a sturdy worktable, and a bucket with a little straw in it where we let the chicken bleed out into. Then we can easily take the bucket and empty it into one of the compost piles.

8. Get a "guts n feathers" trashcan ready. We have one big trashcan that fits perfectly under the worktable. We put a trash bag into it and this is were we put all the leavin's. We do not compost guts n feathers due to dogs and varmints. Some people compost, we do not. Yes. Our garbage guy hates us. Alternatively you can have a big burnpile.

7. Get a "guts we are keeping" bowl ready - for fat and liver. We also bring a lid that fits over the gut bowl to keep over interested chickens and barncats from running off with my livers.

6. Make sure your work area is ready to go. Does the hose reach? You'll use a lot more water than you think. Will the water drain away from your work area or will you be standing in mud soup all day. We try and do all our rinsing over the little gully by the goat yard. This keeps our work area dry. Do you have a good work table? Do you have enough paper towels? Go and get more just in case. And um.. you might want to choose a spot where horrified neighbors or a bus load of kids won't be seeing you, if you take my meaning.

5. OK... tools? Check. Work station? Check. So how do you decide who is first? You can read more about this here. Basically whoever is largest. We pick out the biggest and work your way down.  Roosters are always first.

4. Stop when you get tired. We only ever butcher 4, 5, or 6 chickens at a time. That's it. We don't do all day butcher marathons. Not only is fresh - not frozen - chicken more delicious... but this allows the rest of the smaller chickens to plump up, saves room in the freezer, and is less exhausting. Plus we don't have room to chill 20 birds in the fridge at one time. Don't just stick them directly into the freezer - let them rest a couple days. So we would rather do 3 or 4 butcher days then try and get them all done in one whack. But won't the meats flop over dead after 7 weeks? Nope. We've butchered as late as 4 months. But do what works for you.

3. Make stupid jokes. Seriously. It breaks the tension and makes the work easier. The best one is, of course, "do you think he's faking it?" We get so much mileage out of that joke..... these words were spoken by my favorite farm kid several years ago as we all stood over a just killed carcass. It wasn't faking it and that joke will never not be funny. Some people think that butcher day should be a somber, reverent, emotionally draining day. For us it's not. We are thrilled that we can raise our own food and feed ourselves. All that work. all that time, and now today - the butcher day - is the big pay off. We couldn't be happier about our harvest. Seek joy and express it - even if it is with dumb jokes.

2. Print out your instructions. Personally I love the method taught by the indomitable Harvey Ussery. No matter how much you read up on it, or how many videos you watch, butchering won't make sense until you are out there in the thick of the action. If you are a little nervous then you might forget the steps or not be sure what to do next.... so print out the instructions so you can read them. Believe it or not, we still do this sometimes. The work is very interesting but it helps to have some guidance. Sometimes I'll pretend I'm the Medical Examiner on an episode of CSI:Barnyard. "I am now making the first incision..... " Or you might just blurt out "what the heck is THAT?" So having the instructions right at your side gives you some confidence if you know what is going to happen next...and what the heck THAT is.   

1. Have good courage. Don't freak yourself out. If you are nervous, scared, or freaked out pray for courage. You can do this. If you don't have any courage then you can borrow some of mine. I know that you can do this. You have worked so hard to get to this point so you might as well see it thru to the end.

At some point everyone who marches out to butcher for the first time thinks... yeah.... maybe not. But here is the thing -  you can either "chicken out" and give up and sell those birds, avoid it all together and watch them flop over dead from the inevitable creepy meat heart attacks, or you can square your shoulders, set your jaw, and march out there boldly. If anything you owe it to yourself to give it a try. There is a difference between not being able to do something and choosing not to. You won't know until you give it a go. I believe in you. You can do this. Yes you can.

Now get out there, tiger, and let me know how it went. If you, or anyone else, need courage on that day then send me an email, get me a pm, or ask for help on the facebook. I'll totally cheer you on. Yay team! Winner, winner you are so close to that chicken dinner!

Happy Thursday everyone! Any last minute tips for a first time butcher day?

My Wish List

I listed my favorte things the other day - all stuff I use and love. But what is on my wish list? What do you get the farmer who already has the basics? Pretty much you level up to bigger and better tools.

I love this knife holder. My knives aren't banging around together in a drawer or left out on the counter.

I already have one of these magnetic knife holders. But I really need another. They work great. I can even keep my kitchen shears here. I will note, tho, I'm not sure this is the best idea if you have kids due to possible death and dismemberment from falling knives. As it is we made sure to put it out of the way of over interested cats.

I also need a new boning knife.I'm pretty sure my best one was accidentally thrown out after one of our butchering sessions. I have one... but it's not the same. I also don't have a Santoku knife. Can you believe it? So those two knives are on my list. Do I "need" them? Nope but I sure want them.

Next in the kitchen.... the Le Creuset goose pot. In blue. Yes. THAT goose pot. Seriously... I'm weak in the knees over it. I'm pretty sure that OD the Gander is safe tho... that is some serious cabbage to throw down for one pot.

The other day I saw an episode of The Mind of a Chef about Argentine chef Francis Mallmann. Wow! So now I need two of his books, Seven Fires and Mallmann on Fire. What an amazing chef! Plus I need to learn to roast a whole lamb (or goat) over fire. On a stick. Awesome.

Based on how my make shift greenhouse plastic fared (badly).... I really need a roll of FarmTek's greenhouse film.I was really surprised at how brittle my bought-from-a-box-store plastic became after just one summer...and how it basically blew apart with that last bad windstorm. So I need to get what the pro's use. That is a carefully planned purchase tho - it's pretty expensive.

I'm fairly certain I need a drone. I don't even need a reason. The one with the video camera. But then if I had one I could get some great vids of me working with my Dog Horde to show folks how it's done. Or I could spy on Nibbles. Or scare the chickens. *Thinks about how awesome that would be.*

Or I could just get a GoPro and strap it on Nibbles. Then I could see the world from her point of view. It could help relations. Or not. Still awesome.

But really the one electronic doohickey that I really need is Amazon's Fire TV Stick. Have you seen this? It's amazing. You plug it into your TV and then you can watch online... without using your computer! Seriously. Is this genius or what? We've been trying to find a solution to us sticking a cord into my laptop. Inevitably, Pepper or one of the other cats will step on the cord and we'll lose the picture. Usually at the most exciting part of the show. Plus I can't facebook and watch TV at the same time. If I had this I would be able to interweb an TV watch. It's like a dream within a dream.

We watch almost all our shows online. Turn on the TV at an appointed time? Are you nuts? That is so 1990 or something. If we can't watch in on Hulu, the Netflix, or on Amazon's Instant Video service then forget it. So for $40 this Amazon's Fire TV Stick solves all our problems.

They also have a set top thingy - Amazon Fire TV-that is voice activated.... but it is more expensive and frankly, I'm not ready for the whole "Computer! House of Cards, Season One. Now." Plus I think the dogs would think I was talking to them. I can't even.

So that is my wish list. Oh! And buckets. I always need lots and lots of buckets.

Happy Wednesday everyone! What is on your wishlist?

Editors note: Do you need to shop for someone's wish list? Perfect! Give a click one of these items or use the black Amazon search box on the side of the page. If you do I will get a tiny portion of the sale. I'm not even selling you anything - just pick out what you were already shopping for. It can be anything - books, movies, a drone, or something you need from Amazon anyway.  If you like this blog, or if I've helped you at all in your farming efforts, just make a purchase from Amazon from one of the links, my store, or the black Amazon search box on the right side of this page. I can't see who purchases what or any of the details. THANKS for your support!

Dahli. Done. And.. dog wash.

We've had an eventful day. I need to get in my notes that today was Dahli's special day. We threw her in the back of the truck and rushed her up for a date with a shaggy Alpine buck at a spectacular farm.

My Most Excellent Good Sir. Vexed. And guarding his new rawhide chew.

It worked. It really, really worked. Initially she wasn't interested in their senior buck so they got The New Guy. Dahli went hog wild. It was horrible and I might have nightmares. I shoved the buck fee at the owner and we drove away as fast as we could.

My official notes say that Dahli has a typical gestation of about 141 - 145 days. So that means we can expect babies.... whenever she feels like it because lets face it, goats are insane. But we'll shoot for April 22 - 26th. 

I'm hoping that we can take Debbie and Daisy up there this weekend when they due to be in heat. Honestly, I just want this to be over with. You know I have zero love for goat breeding.

What about Nibs? Well. We decided that we are not going to breed her. Between Deb and Dahli we get a huge bucket of milk. If Daisy is going to pull her weight then Nibbles' paltry quart a day just isn't worth it. Sorry, Nibs. No love for you.

In other news. These are the things my Dog#1 does not think are funny. At all:

1. You, standing too close to me.
2. Going to the dog wash.

He has had plenty of shenanigans for today. However, he is now significantly less stanky and he is nice and clean.

Have you been to the self serve dog wash? It's really the best thing going. The local PetsMore has this service. You buy the tokens at the cashier then haul your uncooperative dog back to the special dog wash room. They have a kind of car wash set up (pre-wash, suds, rinse, etc) and a nice dog shower ready for use.

Mostly you don't get wet... and they have a huge pile of towels available.  And a special blow dryer.  But the best part is that you don't get dog hair all over your own bathroom. For just $10 this was totally worth it.

It's really fun. Well. I thought it was fun. My Most Excellent Good Sir did not think it was amusing at all. He was vexed. But as always, he silently endured the humiliations galore.

Everyone at the store was wow'd by my big white wolf. But they all stayed back thanks to my "don't mess with my dog" stare.

For his cooperation we stopped at the treats aisle and got him a special candy cane shaped rawhide chew. But he just wanted to go home and sulk. So he did.

None of this was planned for today. Farming - you never know what is going to happen.

Happy Tuesday everyone! Do you take your dog to the dog wash?